Sunday Morning Confusion

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Me: I can’t breathe, my sinuses are clogged, I’m not sleeping…

Dr: When did these symptoms start..

(Are you kidding me? Is this not the same Dr I’ve been seeing since 1997?)

Me: Since 1997.

Dr. Then you know there’s nothing we can do…

More evidence that we’re just not all that far advanced from bleeding and throwing chicken bones to heal people.

 

I swear I’ve had a sinus infection since the day I arrived in Minnesota, July 1 1995. Living in California I had an allergy problem that went back to July 6, 1963, the day I was born.. Breathing is underrated.

 

As such… I awoke this morning with a ripper of headache, centered right between the eyes. ‘Twas a function of the dry air, and a lack of sleep. A lack of sleep brought on by a jam session and my neighbors comfort. The jam session was about three hours of playing guitar at the Rabbi’s house. Can’t say no to clergy when you get a invite. It was a blast. BUT, Mrs Rabbi, aka Cantor, had some delicious ice tea for us. Singing when you have post nasal drip going requires hydration so I sipped on an a delicious ice tea all night. Realizing at then I drank about 8 glasses of tea. So it was either caffeine from the tea, orlthe four urgent trips to the john, a vision of my not-to-distant future when I start making the old guy midnight march to the can more regularly.

The other problem is my neighbor has some problem with his heating system that causes it to whine like dying cat at various intervals during the night. Last night it kicked on 34 times that I counted. Whist laying there. Mrs S counted 36, she thinks I was in can for two of them. 

 

So here’s what was thinking about during my overnight contemplation time…

 

Sports-

I hate it when facts get in the way of good opinions. But I have to point out, reality wise, the inept and oft ridiculed Minnesota Timberwolves are.. please sit down, the most successful professional sports team in Minnesota. Gasp… I said it. I can’t claim it, that would be because I first heard it this morning on KSTP when Scot Korzo (Short for Korsenowski) made the comments as I was driving the girl into Religious school this morning. I hate to say it, his logic makes sense. The last time the Vikings, the supposed successful franchise in town, won a playoff game was in 2000. If that’s the measure of “good”, the last time the team was good, was in the.. and this really sucks to say… was in the Denny Green years. Say that ain’t so Pu-leese. Even the Twins, have only made the playoffs three times since I’ve lived here. And, in those three appearances they’ve been shown the door in the first round every time. 

Up until the last few years, the Woofies have made the playoffs and gotten out of the first round of the playoffs at least once.. I want to hate the Wolves, and I can argue that at this specific moment in time, they’re the most dysfunctional bunch in town.. but they have had some success.

Speaking of sports, I found myself on campus at the U of M this weekend. I hadn’t been over there since they started construction on the football stadium.. now there’s an organization with f”d up priorities. They went and put up a stadium on only parking for the University Hockey Arena, Gopher’s hockey BTW, the only successful team at that school. Now where am I gonna park? AND, Speaking of the vaunted Gopher football team.. the formally 7-0 Gopher team.. Didn’t I tell you this is the same rotten team that went 1-12 last year? Well, I hope you didn’t buy tickets to Pasadena for the Rose Bowl back in October. Thank you Iowa Hawkeye’s for showing us reality. 55-0 is a good drubbing, do I hear Alamo Rental Car bowl? I don’t think I’ll bother to watch.

 

Only in Minnesota-

Heard at the Sank home for wayward teenagers today…

“Do I need a coat today, it looks nice out side”. “I don’t think you need one.”

Ok fans from other climes. Looking out side my window this morning I saw a lawn with snow on it, snow which fell yesterday and hasn’t melted 24 hours later. That means it’s no warmer than 32 degrees out side, and based on the complete lack of meltage anywhere, it’s probably colder than that. Checking the thermometer it was about 27 degree out side. For Minnesota, that’s balmy, Nope you don’t need a coat.

Again, Only in Minnesota-

This election for Senate here in the gopher state is getting absurd. I now think Al Franken is going to win by about 2 votes. The Current margin being less than 200 after 3 million. My neighbors have suggested that if Franken gets elected we’re going to be the laughingstock of America.. How could we elect this numbskull. I would respond with.. one word. Jessie. In other words, Minnesota and stupid electorate has precedence.

Rochester Minnesota-

Nice little town 60 miles south of me. Home of the Mayo Clinic. The economy in Rochester is cranking thanks the their private bail out. Seems Saudi Arabian  King Abdullah bin Abdulazizn arrived in town Nov. 15 for a check up at the Mayo Clinic, seems when the King travels.. hundreds come with him. Collectively they spent over 2 million dollars during their two week stay. It’s good to be the king. Of course I can help but wonder about.. is His Royal Highness, Protector of Islam, absolute monarch of the “kingdom”, have the same experience as I do when some peasant doctor approaches him from behind and says.. “you’re going to feel a little pressure…” Maybe the King has a special gilded exam room down at Mayo.

And, speaking of Mayo, I read in the paper this morning where Doctors down there have announced that in the future all gall stone bladder removals will happen either through the mouth, or  the, ahem… vagina. I know what I’ll pick.

 

Obama-mania

The way things are going, I’m thinking I’m going to get Obama’s Birthday off as a holiday by next year. If he fixes the financial mess we’re in.. well deserved. Does that mean I have to work overtime on Bush’s birthday? Or should we just obliterate July 6 for the calendar all together. Go from the 5th to the 7th, and add a day to February? Wait now, my birthday is July 6.. I’m not so keen on that plan.

My rightwing lilly white republican neighbor came by yesterday, after three weeks of silence after the election and announced that he’s scared shitless about the next 4 years. His next comment was Obama was elected by people who don’t understand the world, don’t know who they were voting for, don’t understand politics and were dupped some how, too may immigrants voted, minorities don’t know what they’re doing and HOW could I have voted for him, how could 80% of Jews vote for him when he’s against making money and “you guys are all about that”. Just don’t get it.. something went way wrong and thankfully we’ll fix it in 2012 when America realizes that Republican politics are the politics of patriotism. We voted for him, I suggested, because people with attitudes like yours are still around and it scares me.

Hopefully I won’t see him again for lonnng time.

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